mostly winding down, finishing doctors appointments if not much else. eating sandwiches. big deal i guess.

and cucumbers, lots of cucumbers...

thinking about next fall already.... zagreb? st. pete? 

uze chustvuyou luche!

hey, well alls pretty well. sent out a few letters the other day , got a nevic maladec on my exam , and now i'm just trying to survive the burned-out-ness of my fellow classmates. i can't understand, literaly can't undertand when people genuenly dont want to learn. oh yea, and i hate fraility. unapologetically. suck it up i say. bu they're all right. just speak you fucking english! one of these words i'll snap. sometimes harder really IS bette rand everyone knows it.

off to write about elephants sitting on cars or my future or doing something with someone else... haha.

так я сейчас б библиотеке, пишу домашние задание, в питбурге. чуствую плоха потому что незанаю цто буде с мной в зизне! плоха что
ухе неговарю по-чещки, и я неуберина, почему занимаюць рускум языком, хатя правилно гобарю! но монго сейчас узнаю...

from one languag of conflict to another. i was inspired by my xanga digest email from andrea today to write in this things; it used to be fun anyways, and people tell me that they still remember my hometown website from middle school (which, by the way still exists and if you have an elephants memory, you should wrech youself).

so i'm living in the wierd house in the burgh right now with old half -friends. they basically waste time and watch documentaries about porn, etc, live the life, youknow. i'm been working really hard, especially the first few weeks here. but it was all for the good and the presentation at asp in florida went well. i've been back from that but all the work here puuls you in a time warp and i still fell the two lost days from two weeks ago. the people in the class are so done...kind of annoying and frustrating, wow my typing sucks, i'll have to do those exercises when i get back to school! at any rate, all in all i've been feeling really confused about what i want to be doing with all my copious youth and energy. gettign better i guess, but time lost is time lost any way you slice it and i've resined to it. i've got a goos thing going with the languages, pity i grew up all this time not knowig it , just after my critical period ended.

oh yea, yea for the critical period by the way, and a crazy few weeks. how romantic right, 2 for 2.

peace~

well, the wheeling feeling again, right? the farm is nice, and so are old friends. maybe i'll accept this while thing once in a while, or for a long while.

i mean both here and there.

people grow up a bit, talk louder so that all will listen. show it up.

i took that personality test, but maybe i wouldn't show up all those people after all.

when i explain myself about why i;m interesting, i almost get to belieing it.

who knows, maybe i'm only beautiful in wheeling. '

not if it keeps just melting off like this though.

who else will come around. i put in my manditory appearance sunday night, dangerously close to my grandparent house, so now there has at least been the sighting that will satisfy and keep my rep up, or down, depending. at least i don't plan on droping acid for the rest of my life or being a slicker, maybe both are equel.

i realised that i'll jest straddle, the whole issue, being life, make excuses for not being understood by not understnading. then when i'm old and tired i'll coem back for a rest and find, though i've know it for years, that it's not the language after all. it's the condition.

but i sure liked talking hte other night, partner